Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Beautiful Moms - Loving Their Daddy

Today is a special day - Eric and I have been married for 14 years. FOURTEEN! Looking back over the years, so much has happened that all the events and moments make that day seem so very far away.

The day after we said, "I do," we moved out of state for 3 years. We've been through 8 vehicles, 7 homes, 4 states, 11 harvest seasons, 11 hospital admissions (childbirths plus children's health issues), at least 8 ER visits, farm robberies, a parent's death, the deaths of 2 grandparents, and the births of 7 children. The list goes on and on.

One thing stays the same - our love.

Scratch that. That has not stayed the same.

It has become stronger. Each situation - good or bad - has brought us closer together as a couple. Ok, well, maybe one or two of our moves made us a little crazy; but in the end, we kissed and made up.:)

You may be thinking, "Well, happy anniversary and all, but what does this have to do with Beautiful Moms and motherhood?"

So glad you asked.

First, I couldn't let this day go by without mention.

Second, part of becoming a beautiful mom is loving your child's daddy. Not only are we instructed to love our husbands in God's Word (Titus 3:4: That they may teach the young women to be, sober, to love their husbands), but loving our husbands is our children's first and foremost example of how Christians ought to love one another. If parents cannot get along how can we expect our children to get along with one another? If our children do not see how wonderful love in a Christian marriage can be, why would they "bother" to find a Christian mate when the world seems to have the claim on "love" and "happily ever-after"?

When someone asks us if we love our husbands, it's the rare Christian wife and mother who would say "no." But, what would our children answer? Our children only know what they see. Children do not understand the concept of "love is a commitment, not a feeling," or, "people don't have to be affectionate all the time to love each other." While these statements may be true, children need to see to believe.

Do you try to look pretty for your husband when he comes home? There are days when it's been so crazy and you've been barfed on by the baby 10 times. Your darling husband is so understanding. But, his understanding kindness shouldn't allow the sloppy, haggard look to be the norm. Think back to when you were dating. Didn't you make sure you looked "just right" for the man of your dreams?

Do you smile at your husband? A cheerful wife does much to lift the heart and spirits of the working man who provides for his family. "She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life."

Do you listen to your husband as he shares about his work day, projects, and ideas? Do you encourage him? Do you only speak to him of dirty diapers and schoolwork or do you try to expand your conversational skills? Oh, don't get me wrong. Dirty diapers and schoolwork are a huge part of our day and our loving husbands do like to hear what is going on in our homes. But, think back to conversations we had during our dating years - telling about our growing years, sharing hopes and dreams. Having children ought not put an end to hopes and dreams - they ought to make them abound even more. Raising our children often will remind of us stories from our own childhood. I know that sharing these tales helps us to understand and love each other even more as well as help us decide what path to take with our own family.

Do you reach for your husbands hand as you drive to church or walk in the parking lot? Do you rub his shoulders as he sits at his desk? Do you give him a hug as he washes his hands after working on the car?

None of these things are difficult to do, yet, they keep that flame going. They also provide tangible evidence to the little ones in your home that you think their daddy is the greatest man in the world and you love him just as much (if not more) than they do. Keeping love alive will relieve stress on you and keep you joyful, as well.

"The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her...Her husband is known in the gates...Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her."

Love their daddy and you will become an even more Beautiful Mom.


Felicia said...

Happy anniversary! I love this post. You are one of the best example's I've seen of this very subject. I don't think your kids will ever doubt your love for Eric!
And when you two are out alone (w/o your 7 kids;) you could DEF. be mistaken for newly-weds! :) I hope you have a great anniversary! <3

Jenna said...

This was a GREAT post, and would be he best to write on the subject since you are doing it already!
Thanks for all the good ideas. Especially the one about smiling!

Anonymous said...

Happy anniversary!! Your Aunt Peggy & I have celebrated our 48th anniversary this year and your statement is totally true - love grows stronger with the years. We look forward to you and Eric continuing to provide examples of Christian parents and lovers.
Uncle Richard

Little Family said...

I have to say that you two are a huge example to Peter and I. After 14 years, the love for one another still oozes out of you two. It's great to see that even after all you have been through, you still look at him like you are 16 and have a huge crush. :)

Stefanie said...


Angel said...

Happy Anniversary! Very sweet post. You and Eric are blessed.

Heather said...

Happy Anniversary you guys!!! It doesn't seem like 14 years, does it? That will be us next month! Can't believe it. You're right, your love grows stronger & changes into a deeper love as the years go by. Thanks for the reminders of how to be a beautiful wife/mom for my family. Things I knew, but needed to be reminded of. I pray for many more years of wedded bliss for you two!